Morning Call.

I awake to the rattling hum of a saw buzz outside my window. I fade in and out of dreams and lay in half-consciousness trying to pull from my mind the images of my dreams in order, try to make some kind of sense out of them. I was trying to teach Walker to fly last night. I was also trying to convince Rob that we needed a gigantic dog like Samson. Last night I dreamed that I put two 100 dollar bills into a soda machine and had to walk around everywhere with huge pockets full of change. I think that dream is about moving and about putting too much of myself into things, about offering up too much and getting back too little. I was trying to put the change somewhere safe while I went down a waterslide in an amusement park I had broken into with my Mom. I'm not sure what that means.

Sometimes dreams are simply replaying your days in an abstract way and sometimes they are subtle premonitions. I have a lot of adventures in my dreams. I wonder if that's because I don't have so many in real life or because everything I do in real life is an adventure.

I've sat here tonight and tried to write the second half of En Route Thereto. I'm listening to Beethoven's Symphony Number 4 in B Flat, Op. 60. It's nice to write to classical music, especially when it moves so nicely as this symphony. I really enjoy the pace and the build. It's not too flashy or jumpy. It doesn't move too quickly between high and low volumes. I think all the instruments are at a really nice level on the recording that I have. It makes my writing kind of move in a way that is slightly easier and more fluid. 

I suppose I use this blog as more of a relaxation tool, a way to get basic thoughts written down so that I can move past them to more interesting and focused ideas. Also, it's partially a winding down after a time of trying to get things written and if I haven't succeeded at least I'll succeed in writing something down, even if it is dribble that nobody cares about and that needs not be published. 

Fernando should come alive again. That would be more productive than a bunch of pointless chatter.